How many of you resolved to yell less at your kids this year? Actually, let me amend that, to just be nicer to your kids? I ask because I've seen a whole lot of stuff going around the web lately about how to stop yelling. Apparently yelling is the new spanking for our generation. I get it. Yelling at your kids totally sucks. Even while you're doing it you are already regretting it, yet you can't seem to make it stop. Nobody wants to parent that way - for sure. But I'd bet that most of … [Read more...]
Parenting Styles: The Cavity Club
With four kids, the chances that we’d escape childhood with no cavities were pretty slim, right? Still, I admit it, I was getting a little smug. After visits to the dentist every six months for the last five or six years with no trouble at all, I kind of thought we had the tooth thing dialed. I mean, we’re religious about brushing and flossing in the morning, and we do get a little lazy as the day drags on, but they brush and floss more often than not at night. Still, I thought their … [Read more...]
Parenting Styles: Kindergarten Intervention
Sounds ominous, right? With our third kiddo in kindergarten this year, we’re old hands at the parent-teacher conference. But this year, after the usual awesome conferences for our oldest two, we heard something we’d never heard before. “We’re lucky this year to have intervention at the kindergarten level, and I hope you’ll be open to letting B participate,” his teacher said matter-of-factly. For a second, I really floundered as I considered what exactly they were intervening in. Refusing … [Read more...]
Parenting Styles: The Lessons that Sink In
One of the big things about being a parent is this idea of modeling good behavior. I mean, we talk about expectations for behavior, and I think that’s important, but then we have to actually put them into practice. Things, like being kind and treating others as you'd like to be treated yourself, are a big deal in our house. Around the holidays, we also talk about giving and the idea that you can experience real joy when you give to others. You’d think that would be a hard concept for kids, … [Read more...]
Parenting Styles: When Kids Call Your Bluff
Sometimes, in my weaker moments, when my three year old (the one going on, like, sixteen) decides now is the time to assert her three feet of independence, I bluff. The trouble is, it’s starting to backfire. Here’s a recent example. “Okay, ready to go? We have to go pick up your bothers and sister at school!” This is an exciting event ninety percent of the time, and she usually hustles to grab shoes and whatever miscellaneous items must accompany her - and there are a lot - but lately, … [Read more...]
Parenting Styles: We Suck at Bedtime
Close to a million hits in less than half a second can’t be wrong - bedtimes are important for kids. And that’s a bit of problem around here, because we suck at bedtime. But we can’t be the only ones, right? I mean, with the exception of my one friend who, every single night, spends a good twenty minutes listening and chatting and reading and, you know, just killing the parenting game with one child while her husband does the same with the other - and then they switch - how many parents … [Read more...]
Parenting Styles: Kids Are Gross
Last spring, I was soaping up our two littlest in the tub when I felt a bumpy patch on the inside of our then five-year-old’s upper thigh. I took a closer look when I was toweling him off, and saw a group of little red bumps. They didn’t seem to bother him, so I made a mental note and we moved on. But the next time he was in the tub, I felt them again and this time, they were bigger - less like little bumps now, and more like raised, red, pimply-looking warts. Uh, gross. “What are … [Read more...]
Parenting Styles: When Kindergarten Nerves Become Kindergarten Anxiety
On the first, second and third days of kindergarten, my just-turned-six-year-old was a champ. He marched right on in and emerged six hours later, triumphantly on day one, and then a little more wearily as the days passed. Then, on Thursday morning, as we waited for the bell to ring, his sister whacked him straight in the face with the tetherball. And the floodgates opened. “I don’t want to go to school,” he sobbed, wrapping his arms around my thighs. “I miss you too much, and it’s too … [Read more...]
Cleaning House: A Mom’s 12 Month Experiment to Rid Her Home of Youth Entitlement
Don't worry - this is not another book about ridding your life of all excess items. Rather, Cleaning House: A Mom's 12 Month Experiment to Rid Her Home of Youth Entitlement is a parenting book I first read about three years ago and continue to think about with regularity. As I was reflecting on what I wanted to do with my kids this summer, the book again came to mind as I was thinking about what kitchen skills we really need to start practicing more. Kay … [Read more...]