It’s probably an understatement to say raising a child from birth to adulthood can be a rollercoaster. Once you graduate out of the toddler years, things appear to be smooth sailing. You have a child that no longer needs their diapers changed, can communicate well, and is, hopefully, learning to be more self-sufficient by the day.
Things can start to get a little wobbly, once again, when your child goes from the double digits into numbers that contain the word ‘teen.’ As a mother of three teenagers myself, I have to tell you, we just can’t parent our teens the same as we did when they were little.
We have to start re-thinking our strategy. So how do you go about forming your teen parenting plan? Just like you did when you were a brand new parent, by reading up!
Need a good place to start? Check out this collection of 25 parenting tips on raising teenagers from the Center for Parent and Teen Communication (CPTC). At just 100 words each post, these snack-sized pieces of advices are short and direct, so they’re easy to remember and put into action.
After reading through all 25 posts, I found a few that especially hit home.
And, since we’re all in this together, I’ll share how my husband and I were able to glean insight into the mind of our teens. So, without further ado, here are my top five tips; a kind of #ParentingPlaylist if you will…
#1 Calm Conversations
Sometimes things can get heated when talking to a teenager, especially when you’re not seeing eye to eye. CPTC suggests talking with your kids, not at your kids.
It’s important to validate their feelings because, during this stage of their life, emotions are close to the surface. As we’ve chosen to slow our own emotions in the conversation, I’ve really noticed the dialogue doesn’t escalate to an argument nearly as often.
2. Lighthouse Parenting
As a parent, there’s always an urge to fix things that are wrong for our kids. We did it when they were little, so, naturally, we want to keep ‘helping.’ We read in this post that we should balance care with protection.
Be like a lighthouse that is strong and known, but does not follow the boat into the water. With this in mind, we’ve been trying to let our teens have independence. We let them make mistakes because they know where to go when they need help.
3. Teaching Them to Deal with Stress
This is something we don’t always think about. As parents we have our own set of stresses. Generally, we don’t let our children in on how we deal with disappointment or what to do when things are out of our control.
CPTC recommends letting our children watch us go through these things. We need to show our master problem solving techniques. Afterall, teens have their own stressful lives and they need parents to teach them to navigate that stress.
4. Tell Them the Truth
The world is full of so many messages meant to tear down self-confidence. Our teens don’t have years of experience to know which voices to listen to and which ones to ignore.
I love that this parenting tip was just simply to tell our teens the truth. We need to be giving them positive messages to offset all the negative. Often times, we assume our kids know all the things they’re good at, so this was a good reminder to say it and say it often.
5. Keep Your Cool
How you feel links to how you think, it just does! You can’t solve problem unless you have a clear head.
If our teens can learn how to keep their cool when things get heated, they’ll be able to quickly get to the bottom of the issue at hand. While you can’t control someone else’s emotions, you can control your own- and that’s contagious. I’ve noticed that if my husband or I can keep our cool in a situation, it will affect the other partner’s mind-set and help us get on the same page.
Those are my top 5 pieces of advice from the list but every family is different. I highly encourage you to take 5-10 minutes to scroll through them all to find the biggest game-changers for your teen!
*This post is sponsored by Center for Parent and Teen Communication. All thoughts and opinions are 100% our own.
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